When ordering my Dell XPS, I spent way more money than I needed to, but I wanted a good warranty and good tech support.

Tech support is spotty, and customer service should be called “no customer service.” Every time I call, I get a different answer to the same question.

The two departments sent me back and forth. “That’s a customer care problem.” I call customer care. “That’s a tech support issue.” I bounced around for 19 hours (with about 6 to sleep).

One woman– I am told her name is Sheila Marmu–directed me to call Microsoft, and the phone number she gave me WAS TO A PORNOGRAPHIC PHONE SERVICE.

A customer care rep I spoke with later said that the number she gave me is not on any of the lists of referral numbers given to reps like Ms. Marmou. I asked how I could file a formal complaint and was told that there is no such procedure.

A gentleman named VINEET told me that he couldn’t help me bec Dell systems were down. He told me I could call back in two hours. Everything would be fine in two hours.He gave me a number where I could call him back at that time. “I will be waiting,” he said. The number he gave me as his was “an invalid number.”

The story goes on and on. Coincidentally, every one of the reps who screwed wtih me are in Mumbai. Twice I was connected to reps in the Philippines, and both were quick to respond and actually did what they said they were going to do.

A nice gentleman in Mumbai named Marcus (right) first tried to fob me off on Microsoft. He gave me the real, non-porno number to Microsoft, and he also waited patiently while they told me that since the product came bundled in Dell, Dell had to correct it. Instead of sending me the replacement for what I needed (i purchased a five -year warranty), he did everything he could to NOT send me what I needed. First he said that it would be impossible. Then he relented and said he could,but he would like to try one more thing to try to solve my issue. I would have to wait overnight.

Said he’d call back. Even told me his ID rep number in case I wanted to speak to him. BULL-oney. And he never called back.

Perhaps because I wisely continued to pursue the issue ( I was on a Monday deadline [I’m a journalist)and had to be ready to roll by EARLY Monday a.m.), Marcus decided not to call as promised.

Nonetheless, I finally got a rep in the Philippines named Mitch, a great guy who helped me immediately. He didn’t have the authority to send out what I needed but while I held on the line, he GOT authority.
It took only minutes. WHY COULDN’T YOU DO THAT , MARCUS??

Dell is the worst customer service in the world. At least it is if you’re dealing with staff in Mumbai. They actually are deceitful. When they aren’t successful in support, they make up a reason for you to call a different number, which turns out to be bogus.

By the by, a rep named jack (uh-huh) in Mumbai said he was transferring me to the proper department. I was on hold for 15 minutes and no one ever answered.

WORST OF ALL, there is no process for relief. You have to complain to the offenders. You cannot get beyond the first two tiers of the lower-archy. THERE IS NO WAY TO CONTACT SOMEONE AT DELL ABOVE THESE CLOWNS.

If Dell, which claims to be great at customer service, knows the kind of service provided by the Mumbai bunch, they’d fire most of them.

HEAR THIS: DON’T PAY THE EXORBITANT COST OF ANY EXTRA WARRANTIES. THEY WON’T HONOR TH EIR COMMITMENT UNLESS YOU HAPPEN TO GET THE ONE IN 1,000 REPS WHO IS ACTUALLY QUALIFIED OR WHO TAKES HIS JOB SERIOUSLY.

Gaz

DVD drive on my laptop stopped reading DVDs but still read CDs fine. A new one was out to me next day and they didn’t even want the old one for proof. Similar happened to my bro although a bit more frustrating seeing as it was the HDD that died.

Having said that….in both our cases the original product fucked up pretty early in it’s life which is a problem. I guess that’s far east mass production for you. That’s why they can sell them so cheap.

Top notch customer service though.